What, like 2020 is hard?

We've all become well acquainted with worry and stress this year. If you're one of the lucky ones that has a system to deal with and accept it, kudos! The rest of us will be over here stuffing our face with some form of processed sugar and rocking in the fetal position to some sort of 80s hard rock ballad.

Seriously though, the state of the country, nay, the world, should make us all take a long, hard look at the toll that all of this is taking on our health - our emotional and mental health. It's just as important as our heart health, gut health, skin health, and any other part of our body. It may even be more important. Our brains are what God gave us to be able to comprehend and make decisions; decisions that effect the health of all other parts of our bodies. If we don't take care of our brains, where do you think that leaves the rest of our body? Scary, I know. 

As I was taking myself a much needed and deserved warm bath tonight after the kids were in bed, I started thinking about all the ways I've used in the past to try and unwind or destress. In the past, I've always handled stress and worry alone. I guess it's one of those 'extroverted introvert' things. When things get serious, I like to talk it out with myself. Yes, I do talk to myself. All the time. Back in college, if something dramatic or tragic (in my mind) happened, I would jump in my car and drive. Just drive. I would drive around for what seemed like hours just talking myself through what just happened and what the best thing to do next would be. If I wasn't talking it out, I had my alternative rock cranked up so loud that I could just yell at the top of my lungs to let everything out. It was quite therapeutic. Nowadays, I can't exactly just jump in my car and drive around when something stresses me out or upsets me. I do use trips to the store by myself as a time to reflect and talk it out. It's not exactly 'hours' but I can do some serious condensed soul searching in a 20 minute outing. #momlife

I'm still trying to find that perfect 'outlet' for the stresses and worry of life right now. Sometimes writing it out helps me. You guys seriously have no idea how many drafts of blogs I have unpublished right now! Sometimes a quiet bath helps. Sometimes it's binge watching a show or getting lost in a Hallmark movie. I used to LOVE getting lost in a good book, but my time just doesn't allow me to really enjoy a long novel right now. I know I'll get there again someday though. Sometimes reading through some Psalms or Proverbs really helps too. So many wise thoughts and a fresh perspective. I do still love to jam out on long drives to the butcher by myself. I also kind of look forward to when Emma has doctor's appointments in Nashville because I know I'll get to drive no less than an hour there and back. Driving is a good outlet for me, at least until I encounter someone who doesn't know how to drive properly. Yep, I got that road rage too. Nashville traffic doesn't really do that much good. 

I know my stress pales in comparison to someone who is wondering how they're going to pay their bills or where their next meal is going to come from. My stress is a stress of my own making. I have had other kinds of stresses in the past, but I honestly have been beyond blessed in my life not to have many tragedies to deal with. That's not to say that they aren't coming though. James assures us that there will be trials. Maybe God is giving me the time to prepare myself before really giving me a good one that will mold me and purify me like gold in a fire. I pray that when that time comes, He's there with me to provide the strength and help that I need to learn whatever lesson He's teaching. I will keep trying to find things to help me mentally reboot and become the wife my husband needs and the mom my girls need. Life is just hard. God never promised it wouldn't be. On the contrary, He promised it would be. So for now, I just try whatever I can think of, and then I pray. We're all knee deep in 2020 now and it doesn't look like it'll be letting up for 2021 either, so all we can do is pray and crank that rock up and let it all out. 

God bless!